Leave Him in the Frog Pond

After a wonderful first date, I was really looking forward to our second.  Being with him was so natural and comfortable - conversation came easy, lots of joking and laughter, affectionate, and a little friendly competition on the miniature golf course following dinner (That's right, ladies.  He not only paid for drinks and a great 3 course meal, but I also got a round of mini golf!)  At the end of the night, he invited me to a baseball game the next day (which unfortunately I had to decline due to scheduling conflicts).

A few days after our date, I had to leave to go out of town for a long weekend.  We continued to talk while I was away, and he made plans to see me the night that I got back (slightly eager).  We had a nice dinner, but the conversation this time really got me.  He opened up about his personal life, but then came information about family.  Apparently every member of his family is on a minimum of their 3rd spouse.  He grew up with parents who continuously fought, and he uttered the statement, "After what I've seen in my lifetime of marriage, I have no interest.  It's a waste of time, energy and money."  Wow, not quite the romantic ending that I had in mind!

Trying to look past the comments at dinner and not judge him based on his family, we went back to my place to watch some TV, and I convince him to see the awesomeness that is Bachelor Pad.  For those of you who watch, it was the episode when crazy Melissa is crying because Blake is flirting with Holly, and she's just heartbroken because the love of her afternoon life has moved his attention on to someone more sane and stable.

After viewing the scene, he turns to me and in all seriousness says, "There's something that I need to tell you.  I would NEVER allow myself  to get hurt like these people because I won't ever allow myself to fall in love because it is guaranteed to end.  When we aren't together, I will not think about you or talk about you.  I'm just not going to put myself out there to get hurt.  It just won't happen.  Ever."

This honestly makes me so sad that someone could feel this way, but I'm not willing to invest my time and emotion to try to help him "see the light."  If a guy is content living the rest of his life alone in the frog pond, we have to accept it and move on quickly - regardless of how cute, comfortable or charming he may appear to be.